sabulana: (pic#1315239)
I have lots of hopes for this new year, far more than I did last year. The fact that I feel hope this time is a big change from last year, where I was convinced everything would be just more of the same. I was wrong, which is a good thing. Over the last year, I've got a job and managed to keep it, I've met some wonderful people and I've had some fantastic moments. There has been stress and worry and I've been sick a couple times, so it wasn't all good but... all of it, everything that's happened has made me feel better about how this new year is going to be.

My resolution last year was simply to stop biting my nails. I kept to it for a few weeks.

This year, I have more.

Firstly, I will write a short story or chapter of a longer story per week. Even if I don't post it somewhere for anyone to read, I will write it. I will let my creative side out more. RP will not count towards this. I would also like it if, when I get back into RP, that it will not consume my life again. It's fun but for quite a while, it was all I could think of. This forced break from it has been rather refreshing. I've started doing things that I wouldn't normally have considered doing because all I could think of was 'I wonder if I've got any new tags? I need to tag back everyone. Must tag, must RP.' When I do get back into RP (because I don't want to stop altogether), I'll have to pick a game and a character carefully.

Next resolution is to get into shape! I am so unfit and I have gained a dress size over the past year. My metabolism seems to be slowing down and I need to step up the exercise and cut back on junk food.

My third resolution is the one that means most to me. I want to be more 'myself'. I want to be more confident in myself. It isn't about fitting in but being true to myself. I've been trying, on and off sort of but I've always been too shy to be truly, honestly true to myself most times. I want that to change. Even if it gets me branded as being weird or something. 

My fourth resolution is to endeavour to find the magic in the world again. There were times when I was a child when everything was full of wonder and as I've grown, I've become more cynical. More jaded. I developed a general contempt for the entire human race and I started... really disliking stuff. I'm grouchy and mean sometimes, and often to the people who deserve it least. So this year, I'm going to seek happiness instead of misery. I'm going to be cheerful and kind and the kind of person I wanted to be when I grew up. I'm going to find the beauty and the strange and the out of the ordinary things in the world instead of feeling like I'm stuck in a huge patch of mud.

I also plan on taking many pictures of everything over the next year.

I don't know if everythin makes sense but the ideas are in my head and I plan on being true to them. Let this year be the year I rediscover my inner child. 2012 is going to be my year.
sabulana: (Grump)
I swear I have not put as much effort into being my normal self as I have today. Being nice should not be this hard.

January 9th cannot come fast enough.

Or January 3rd. I should not want to go back to work this much.

Hopefully, I will have more fun tonight. I'm going out with my boyfriend to meet some of his friends to celebrate New Year's Eve. I have no idea what we'll be doing but I'd better get some wine in me and I have plenty of batteries for my camera. I'm also going to take along an extra memory stick thing. I don't think my current one will be used up but I would rather have an extra, just in case.

Though I have no idea when I'll be able to upload any of the pictures and videos I might take. My brother took our home computer away again, because he is a berk. I mean. He failed to install Windows or something and so he had to take it away again. And because he is massively unreliable lately, I have no idea when I'm getting it back.

I think I should probably just start saving for a new computer. It'll be faster. :|

sabulana: (Default)
I made a Twitter account. I'm not sure why, but I was bored.

I have also stumbled across a game called Echo Bazaar and am enjoying that so far.

I have been bouncing between reading Alice's Adventure's in Wonderland and The Divine Comedy but my Jules Verne book calls to me.

Or I could ignore it all and work on stories of m own. I would still like to know who Bethany is, who she was running from and why. All I know at the moment is that she is a pale girl recently come upon hard times in a Victorian-style grey dress.

sabulana: (pic#1100824)
Just got back from shopping. It's been busy, these last couple days. Since coming over to my boyfriend's house on Boxing Day, we've been over to both his sister's houses for meals and handing out/recieving presents. Then we've been shopping today, spending the Waterstone's gift vouchers I got. They've got copies of the Barnes and Noble Leatherbound classics collection and though they're expensive, they are so worth it. My boyfriend gave me The Divine Comedy and the Lewis Caroll anthology for Christmas and today I've bought the Charles Dickens and Jules Verne books. I was originally after the Grimm Fairy Tales and Edgar Allen Poe but they didnt' have those in stock. I'll have to get them another time. Or order them online. If I can get them cheaper that way, I'm totally doing it. I must have those books!

In other news, I got a camera for Christmas. Not sure if I mentioned that here yet. That means this journal will devolve into nothing but pictures of my cats. :|

I have taken a few nice pictures though. The twins posed for a rather sweet picture when I was putting them to bed the other night. I'll have to send it on to their parents when I get the computer up and running and can run the installation disc.

At the moment though, we're just resting. Recuperating from Christmas. Next up, New Year's Eve, when we will be going out and getting drunk. If I have my way, there will also be dancing but I rather suspect our night will be Jameson's, where they don't play music and we just drink and talk and then somewhere where they play music too loud to enjoy properly and probably more sitting around. :/ My BF's friends are kinda boring when it comes to nights out. They just want to drink and talk and I get bored of that after a while. Last New Year's was fun though. We started out in Jameson's but then went to Independant and I got to dance with my boyfriend though it was kinda awkward. XD He was taught to dance properly and I... wasn't. >_>

Still~ Looking forward to going out and having a good time then.

And after New Year's... Diet Time. No more cheeseburgers and I'm cutting down on chocolate once I've finished the stuff I got for Christmas. I will be a size 10 again by April! I will!
sabulana: (cute sephy)
Well, hello Dreamwidth~

This is a test post as I explore things around here. I'm totally taking advantage of the free accounts thing with no invite codes to move personal stuff from LJ, after the recent changes there. I'm moving a few RP accounts too. Might more more of them, but later, if I have time. If not, well... the most important ones are here. H've yet to import any data from them though. Also can I just say I love that I can do that? I didn't want to have to start from scratch ne journal. Though, plus side, I can have my username here where I couldn't on LJ - personal issues, I did have one but had to abandon it.


Merry Christmas to all who stumble across this. <3
sabulana: (Default)
The last few weeks in brief:

Sea monsters

Coming soon:


A more detailed entry later perhaps.
sabulana: (brb commiting suicide)
So we're supposed to be getting a new office, right?

Except some issues keep popping up, like where will this new office be?

My aunt was fine with the arrangements being made to have an office up at the warehouse, where all the drivers stop by once a day. It would be central to everything, we could keep track of who comes and who goes, their hours and all that stuff.

And then someone from the British Heart Foundation goes on TV and announces to the world that each bag donated to charity is worth £25.

The next day, someone gets some kind of goddamn saw and cuts right through the fucking side of the container where we store the bags donated to Age UK and steals 200 bags.

Yeah, way to go, BHF person. You just basically told everyone to go steal every charity bag they see out on the street - and some that have already been collected for the charity in question. (Another brief suck - we once got an email from some lifeboat charity about how we were all theiving scumbags for stealing people's bags because someone got the bright idea to stick the logo for the charity we deliver for on their van and steal bags. Apparently they were going to contact Rogue Traders about us. fffff Wasn't us, since we didn't have anyone in the area being stolen from at the time though.)

So... now my aunt's boss is looking at other places for the office that would be easier for her to get to.


Neither me nor Alison want to go to Team Valley every day - while doable, it would, in fact, be hell for me. :| And she also is considering somewhere in Felling, where I would consistently get lost, plus Alison would have to travel along a road she hates so... Not to mention, Team Valley and Felling are miles away from the warehouse and therefore out of the way of all our drivers, some of whom do need a little... monitoring, shall we say? >_>
sabulana: (Default)
My computer at home is having issues. The graphics card is fried or something - it turns on okay but it doesn't display anything on either monitor my and my mother tried. I've contacted my brother about sorting it out but his response of 'No problem.' does not exactly fill me with confidence that it will be sorted out soon. I wish I could phone him and get it sorted out quickly but he doesn't have a phone at the moment.

Until it gets fixed, I won't be around online much. I've hiatus'd at Wake and I'll have to freeze my karma on Plurk for a few days because I will only have decent internet access at weekends from now on until my computer is fixed/replaced. (Hoping to get it replaced actually, though I'll have to rescue the hard drive - no way am I losing all my music. D:)

So... extremely limited internet access for a while on my end. I won't be around much - at work, when I can manage it though probably not tagging - and only on AIM at weekends. Kinda sucks but... on the plus side, I can get caught up on books and games. I read a huge chunk of Game of Thrones yesterday and rescued Squall from the D-District Prison in FF8. The Seph-muse enjoyed Rinoa kicking Irvine down the stairs too much, I think. I'll probably finish the book tonight, then I can move on to other things. I have a craving for Holly Black at the moment so I might re-read Tithe/Valiant/Ironside and then White Cat/RedGlove.

But before I can do any of that, I have to finish my work and go home... >>
sabulana: (Faerie)
Augh, I am so bored... ffff

I'm at work and supposedly busy but there isn't much to do. I'm updating the computer files and putting things away but still finding plenty of time to watch BtVS on SyFy. >> But really, I'm just waiting for Sanctuary to come on.

Also, I put my OC, Michael up on D_M yesterday. I am still alternating between /flailingOMGWHATAMIDOING and 'Hee~ this is fun' But I'm sure I'm annoying at least one person on there... but eh, they tagged me first and they're still tagging back so... :/

Also, I found this community [ profile] octoberwriting and decided to sign up on a whim. It's a writing challenge kind of thing, writing short stories during October. I'm gonna give it a go, use it to write some stuff for any one of the prompts I've got and maybe for my OCs too, flesh them out a bit maybe if I'm going to be using them during NaNoWriMo this year. But I'm not sure if I will redo the idea from last year or write Michael's backstory.

I actually found his original bio thing the other day. I wanted to see if it was still up there and... it is. It is terrible and I am so so embarassed by it. fffff But he has grown and developed and is no longer just around for teh lulz and yaoi smexy tiems. >_> He has personality and aspirations and fears and flaws and stuff idek yet. XD

Anyway. Sanctuary is on. Back to work/watching TV~
sabulana: (Default)
Achieved my tag nirvana earlier~ That makes me so happy. I even tagged the month-old musebox threads that were still sitting in my inbox from Feburary and March. >>

I ...may still have forgotten some things but Later.

I've also reset the passwords for most of my RP journals - all the ones I'd forgotten the passwords to. I'll spam join certain museboxes with them later.

I've deleted my muselist from before. I just realised yesterday or the day before that LJ fucked up all the links. My attempts t set it right just deleted all the comm links and turned all journal links to Seph's 'godamongmortals' journal. What the fuck, LJ.

So... I'll sort that out later.

Right now, I've been working on a character profile for my OC. I still need to edit the fic I wrote about him a couple days ago so I'm not posting that yet. Also need to pick a PB for his journal and then... I'm gonna app him. Somewhere. idk. Probably Wake.

Going to sleep now. Starting to get a headache.
sabulana: (Fangirly Joy)
By contrast to this time yesterday, this morning is FUCKING FANTASTIC OMG

Yesterday, when I was out, I decided to go get myself a new PSP memory card at last (although I had to take a detour when Billy showed up and sort of... steered me sideways while asking if I was single. :/ I told him no, said I was going shopping then to work and he went off - in the direction I was meant to be going. fffff). I tried to get PSN working on my PSP at home but it just kept downloading the same update over and over without ever installing it, even though I told it to. In the end I gave up and went to work. Actually got the update installed while I was at work, sneakily plugging the charger in in a corner while my aunt was out. But I still couldn't get on PSN.

And then o nthe way back to my BF's, I had a thought - I could use his PS3, couldn't I? Just download the stuff on there and then transfer it~

...Except the PS3 wasn't plugged in to the TV so I had to sort of fiddle around with that a lot before it would work. :/

But I got it working, added the credits to my account and downloaded Final Fantasy 7, 8 & 9! Took a while, and then I had to install them on the PS3 before it would let me copy them but it is finally all done, about 2 hours after I started.

At last!

And now my only dilemma is - which do I play first?!

lmao, leaving my PSP behind when I go to work is going to kill me. XD I can see my RP activity dropping even more now....
sabulana: (DO NOT WANT)
Haven't slept. Can't sleep.

Spent half an hour looking for the fucking Xbox controllers to play a game but could only find ones that don't work. All kinda of pissed off about that. I HATE WIRELESS CONTROLLERS AUGH WHY DID ANYONE THINK THEY WERE A GOOD IDEA ALL THAT EVER HAPPENS IS THE BATTERIES DIE AT THE MOST INOPPORTUNE MOMENT AND THEY GET LOST AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Cannot get plurk to work properly. Managed to post a plurk but then when I was trying to add more responses about my morning so far, it stopped.

Now I'm all pissed off and want to break things.

Don't think I'll be on AIM later in this terrible mood unless something utterly fucking fantastic happens to me during the day.

And you know what?


Fucking hell. My day has never gone downhill so fast before.
sabulana: (Kaboom!)
Oooh, it's all dramatic at work lately~

I've been meaning to post about it but I keep putting it off. Still... after the things my aunt told me this morning, I just can't help myself~

So, a little background first: we're a distribution company. Earlier this year, we got a contract to deliver charity bags. It's an on-going thing all year round which means constant work for those that prove reliable.

But sicne the start, we had issues with people stealing the bags that are left out. We reported it to the police but we had too little to go on - a few residents saying they'd seen someone take the bags already and they drove a red car and that was all. Red cars are so common it was almost pointless.

Cut for a lengthy tale of thievery and justice )
sabulana: (brb commiting suicide)
I am feeling an increasing need to just say 'FUCK EVERYTHING' and becime a total reculse for a while. No going out, no internet, nothing.

Just me, a pile of books to read and a notebook for when I feel like writing.

Oh, and a massive pile of chocolate too.

But I won't, because I have obligations to fulfil. Work to do, tags to write and other such things. I also have characters I want to app even though I don't know how I'll manage because I am failing so badly with just two at the moment. But I do have... drafts, at least, for the Sephiroth tags I owe, both in [ profile] thewake_rp and [ profile] piecesofworlds. I'm gonna type those out now properly, post them and then... maybe write some backstory for my OC, Michael or the other story set in the same world or watch Sanctuary or play Vampire the Masquerade.
sabulana: (Default)
I'm not sure why but today I just feel utterly miserable. And bored.

But I have a mountain of tags to do, a book to finish reading, games to play...

I seem to have lost my appetite too. It's about 6:30pm and I have not eaten a thing yet I just don't feel hungry at all. I just... don't feel anything.

Today sucks. ;;
sabulana: (Take flight)

Work is boring but the other girl who was helping has gone off on holiday or something so suddenly I have all her work to do again as well as my own.

Plus side - I will not be stuck doing only audits. Also longer hours which means more money.
Minus side - I still have to do audits and cannot foist them off on her.

Wanted to RP last night but my boyfriend would. not. stop. interuppting.

So I got a bit bitchy with him and immediately felt sorry about it. I just wanted to be left alone. I haven't had any real alone time in about six weeks and I'm starting to feel overcrowded. It doesn't matter that I'm currently at work alone or that my BF goes out because it isn't my space. It is his space and I'm just occupying it for a little while.

I cannot wait until Monday... I can finally go home.

But before that, I have to finish today's work, then tomorrow, plus a party tomorrow night and then the weekend after, which I have no plans for. Except to finish a story or chapter if I have not already. ^^;
sabulana: (Default)
So I'm feeling really 'blah' lately. I want to RP and work on fics and stuff but I just have no motivation for anythinglike that.

Part of it is that every time I really get going on something, my BF interrupts, begging to attention and stuff. But I think he leaned his lesson from tht earlier. He was tickling me, something I hate, and I tried to slide off the bed away from him. Except he decided to climb on top of me, came off the bed as well only I landed on him - his wrist, to be most specific. His already damaged wrist that hurts like hell. >_>

 I apologised but still... I feel bad about it now but he's playing Shogun 2 instead of teasing me now.
sabulana: (Broken)
I just did the Mary Sue Litmus test on one of my OCs - the one I consider to be the biggest Gary-Stu.

He scored a 4.


That just... doesn't seem right to me. :/ He should have scored higher. Like... really high.

Reasoning some stuff out )
sabulana: (Default)
Have had two hours sleep. Words do not make sense to me. Would possibly try to smother my boyffriend but I do not think I have th energy to life a pillow.

sabulana: (Default)
Today is a pretty miserable day.

I need some more jeans so I went shopping, only to realise all the clothes I saw in town are... well... dull. Boring. Bland. Or they are hideous. :/ I did get jeans but only because I need them. I don't actually like what I've bought. I guess in time, when they've faded a bit, they'll be alright though.

I did get some new trainers though. They're alright. And some canvas shoes which, because they cover my ankles, my boyfriend does not like. Because he hates boots and I know he does and so I shouldn't have bought them. Even though I really like them. :/ What.

Also I have gone up a jean size and am not happy about it. I'm in the middle of telling my BF how I plan to cut down on junk food, eat more healthily and seek out an exercise routine I actually wouldn't mind doing and he interrupts with 'Just do some exercise like I keep telling you." except his 'telling' feels more like bullying at the moment.

I'm finding my own exercise routine though. I'm not doing anything he tells me to do because it will be something ridiculous that I can't handle. The last one, the Beach Body Insanity thing was just too much - and he never put it on DVD like he said he would so I can't do it at home. I'll seek out my own thing and manage to do that on my own. Fuck him.


sabulana: (Default)

August 2012

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