tag:dreamwidth.org,2011-12-23:1217451SabulanaSabulanaSabulana2012-06-14T21:21:02Ztag:dreamwidth.org,2011-12-23:1217451:267833Venting2012-06-14T21:21:02Z2012-06-14T21:21:02Zpublic0It's been a while since I posted anything here. :/ And now I return in order to vent some stuff.<br /><p> </p><a name="cutid1"></a><p>For the longest time, I’ve wanted to be a writer. Maybe not full time - I don’t think I’ll ever get to that point but still… Writing is what I want to do.</p> <p>But then comes the problem ofwhatto write. At the moment, I have several projects I’m working on. Sort of.</p> <p>First one is something I started way back in 2009 for NaNoWriMo. There have been a few things along the way preventing me from finishing it - like the computer breaking and I thought I lost it but then discovered a copy of my first draft saved online. Awesome. So I started working on it again and then got to part way through editing/rewriting chapter two and thought…</p> <p>…Could I really get this published? I mean, the character and basic plotline were suggested to me by a friend and the character ishis. I just… took the idea and ran. I have no idea if he likes it or agrees with anytihng I’ve written because I haven’t shown him any of the latest version.</p> <p>I could ask for permission to send it off when it’s complete and maybe he’ll say yes. In which case I then start panicking because this story, while being something I love and have had so much fun working on, is something I also get very insecure about because I don’t see a whole lot of stories about anthropomorphic animals. :| Redwall springs to mind, and Watership down but the rabbits are rabbits in that and not rabbits in a more humanoid form shooting each other.</p> <p>No matter what, I am going to work on that story though. I just… would prefer to work on something I feel more confident about getting published.</p> <p>This brings me to project number two. This one stars mostly human characters but also vampires, werewolves, faeries and a talking cat. It’s about a teenage girl finding out about some family destiny type thing and the stress it puts on her family while she tries to cope with it. Her mother is dead against her having anything to do with it but at the same time, doesn’t want to step up and do her part either. This is also fun to work on. I have ideas for several story arcs too and I’m not sure which ones will make it into this book. I figure it might end up being part of a series.</p> <p>And then there is project number three, which I have tentatively named Nyctophobia. It’s actually a series of short stories centred around the theme of darkness. I’ve got a bunch of ideas jotted down and some I’ve begun fleshing out.It’s fun and basically I’m just using it as an excuse to write gory and weird stuff.</p> <p>Now, I like all these ideas. I want to work on them all. But if I try to work on them all at the same time, I will overload myself and give up on all of them. I just can’t pick which one to work on first. Should I work on short stories and maybe find a magazine or something that will print them? Try to get some kind of portfolio or something idk - people keep advising me to send things to magazines but I have no idea what magazines would accept the kind of weird things I like writing. Or I could work on one of the novel-length stories and try to get those published. But which one? Anthro animals in a sci-fi/fantasy setting or supernatural family business? I honestly don’t know which ones to pick but I feel like I have to make a choice now if I’m going to get anywhere later. And I don’t know who to ask for advice.</p><br /><br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=sabulana&ditemid=267833" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2011-12-23:1217451:266181Work venting2012-02-05T22:32:55Z2012-02-05T22:32:55Zpublic0I used to like my job. Sorta. I mean, it was a bit dull but I liked going in. Now I'm dreading Monday morning.<br /><br />It started about two weeks ago. Someone at HQ in York noticed that the company was losing money. It was traced back to our office and this contract we have with a certain charity. We buy the bags from the charity to deliver and then claim the money back based on our returns and routes delivered. Or so I understand it. <br /><br />But the bosses have been taking out the routes with poor results from the reports so it looks as though they haven't been completed - and yet we've paid them because they have been delivered. Maybe we only got one or two bags, maybe we didn't get any - but if someone phones up and asks why they haven't been paid for a route they've delivered, either Alison or Susan will tell me to pay them. <br /><br />I've only been taking over doing the pays for a few months, not the whole time we've been delivering these bags. But since last May, the company has lost about £30k (or so I gather from listening in on phone conversations). All through routes that have been paid but not put on the reports. Only routes with good results get put on the reports so taking out the poor routes makes the company look better, which is all the bosses were concerned about.<br /><br />Until they realised the company had been losing money. <br /><br />Cue mad panic to find out how and why and where the money had gone. :| Bosses were in danger of losing their jobs, apparently.<br /><br />So in the attempt to reclaim some money, they fired me.<br /><br />For doing my goddamn job.<br /><br />Which is such bullshit, it makes me speechless with rage. What the actual fuck?!<br /><br />But my aunt campaigned on my behalf and got me my job back - working less hours and only three days a week but it's better than signing on at the job centre again. :| I just... wish I didn't have to go back now. It's going to be all awkward and stuff. Plus I'm still pretty angry at how this has all turned out. <br /><br />And the worst thing is, I knowif Susan apologises, then I'll accept it and move on. If she bitches at me for not doing anything in work, then I'm going to tell her that it's only because I don't have enough to do - the job she was supposedly giving me to do was taken back by her without even telling me. Plus, there's only so much time I can spend filing before it's all done. :| So of course I'm going to sit and write fic on my phone. I HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO DO UNTIL YOU HAND ME THE PAPERWORK I NEED. And I can't just take it from her because she needs it first. She needs to input it into the computer (supposedly my job except she won't let me do it) although I suppose that comes after she goes dress shopping online. <br /><br />No, seriously. She looked up a dress online, supposedly for some event, and sent one of our drivers to pick it up from the shop. :|<br /><br />But I can't sit and write out a couple hundred words of fic in my downtime. Peacefully. Not disrupting anyone. <br /><br />I just. Augh.<br /><br />Rage.<br /><br />Shutting up now. Not looking forward to work. Taking my time to get there in the morning, I think.<br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=sabulana&ditemid=266181" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> comments