sabulana: (Default)
I'm supposed to be getting ready for work now but I'm still so fucking pissed about last night.

The only good thing about my day is the fact that I'm going to be reading An Abundance of Katherines on the way to work.

I have a mountain of paperwork waiting for me and a desire to spread my cold to everyone I work with. I hope they suffer.

Please note that I'm not usually like this but holy fuck am I pissed right now.
sabulana: (pic#1315254)
I used to like my job. Sorta. I mean, it was a bit dull but I liked going in. Now I'm dreading Monday morning.

It started about two weeks ago. Someone at HQ in York noticed that the company was losing money. It was traced back to our office and this contract we have with a certain charity. We buy the bags from the charity to deliver and then claim the money back based on our returns and routes delivered. Or so I understand it.

But the bosses have been taking out the routes with poor results from the reports so it looks as though they haven't been completed - and yet we've paid them because they have been delivered. Maybe we only got one or two bags, maybe we didn't get any - but if someone phones up and asks why they haven't been paid for a route they've delivered, either Alison or Susan will tell me to pay them.

I've only been taking over doing the pays for a few months, not the whole time we've been delivering these bags. But since last May, the company has lost about £30k (or so I gather from listening in on phone conversations). All through routes that have been paid but not put on the reports. Only routes with good results get put on the reports so taking out the poor routes makes the company look better, which is all the bosses were concerned about.

Until they realised the company had been losing money.

Cue mad panic to find out how and why and where the money had gone. :| Bosses were in danger of losing their jobs, apparently.

So in the attempt to reclaim some money, they fired me.

For doing my goddamn job.

Which is such bullshit, it makes me speechless with rage. What the actual fuck?!

But my aunt campaigned on my behalf and got me my job back - working less hours and only three days a week but it's better than signing on at the job centre again. :| I just... wish I didn't have to go back now. It's going to be all awkward and stuff. Plus I'm still pretty angry at how this has all turned out.

And the worst thing is, I knowif Susan apologises, then I'll accept it and move on. If she bitches at me for not doing anything in work, then I'm going to tell her that it's only because I don't have enough to do - the job she was supposedly giving me to do was taken back by her without even telling me. Plus, there's only so much time I can spend filing before it's all done. :| So of course I'm going to sit and write fic on my phone. I HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO DO UNTIL YOU HAND ME THE PAPERWORK I NEED. And I can't just take it from her because she needs it first. She needs to input it into the computer (supposedly my job except she won't let me do it) although I suppose that comes after she goes dress shopping online.

No, seriously. She looked up a dress online, supposedly for some event, and sent one of our drivers to pick it up from the shop. :|

But I can't sit and write out a couple hundred words of fic in my downtime. Peacefully. Not disrupting anyone.

I just. Augh.


Shutting up now. Not looking forward to work. Taking my time to get there in the morning, I think.
sabulana: (brb commiting suicide)
So we're supposed to be getting a new office, right?

Except some issues keep popping up, like where will this new office be?

My aunt was fine with the arrangements being made to have an office up at the warehouse, where all the drivers stop by once a day. It would be central to everything, we could keep track of who comes and who goes, their hours and all that stuff.

And then someone from the British Heart Foundation goes on TV and announces to the world that each bag donated to charity is worth £25.

The next day, someone gets some kind of goddamn saw and cuts right through the fucking side of the container where we store the bags donated to Age UK and steals 200 bags.

Yeah, way to go, BHF person. You just basically told everyone to go steal every charity bag they see out on the street - and some that have already been collected for the charity in question. (Another brief suck - we once got an email from some lifeboat charity about how we were all theiving scumbags for stealing people's bags because someone got the bright idea to stick the logo for the charity we deliver for on their van and steal bags. Apparently they were going to contact Rogue Traders about us. fffff Wasn't us, since we didn't have anyone in the area being stolen from at the time though.)

So... now my aunt's boss is looking at other places for the office that would be easier for her to get to.


Neither me nor Alison want to go to Team Valley every day - while doable, it would, in fact, be hell for me. :| And she also is considering somewhere in Felling, where I would consistently get lost, plus Alison would have to travel along a road she hates so... Not to mention, Team Valley and Felling are miles away from the warehouse and therefore out of the way of all our drivers, some of whom do need a little... monitoring, shall we say? >_>
sabulana: (Kaboom!)
Oooh, it's all dramatic at work lately~

I've been meaning to post about it but I keep putting it off. Still... after the things my aunt told me this morning, I just can't help myself~

So, a little background first: we're a distribution company. Earlier this year, we got a contract to deliver charity bags. It's an on-going thing all year round which means constant work for those that prove reliable.

But sicne the start, we had issues with people stealing the bags that are left out. We reported it to the police but we had too little to go on - a few residents saying they'd seen someone take the bags already and they drove a red car and that was all. Red cars are so common it was almost pointless.

Cut for a lengthy tale of thievery and justice )
sabulana: (DO NOT WANT)
Still procrastinating over my NaNo novel today. I had to go out earlier and it threw off my schedule. Even though I knew I had to go out. >.> Stupid jobcentre appointment getting in the way of my typing.

Anyway, before I left this morning, I was quickly browsing the internet for anything I could put in the little diary thing they gave me. I came across an ad on the website for a trainee sales position. Since I've got no experience in sales but am supposed to be looking for work in that area, I thought 'what the hell, it's something to write down on the diary thing' and clicked to apply.

That was this morning, at about 10am.

Earlier this afternoon, I got a phone call from the company...

Cut for length! )

I've talked about it with my mother too, when she came home from work and she doesn't think I should go either. I guess that settles it then.

In other news, I almost set fire to the house again today. :3 I tried lighting oil burners to cover the small of burned lasagne from yesterday and... well...
ALSO CUT FOR LENGTH. Aren't I considerate: :D )
sabulana: (Default)
Man, plotting is complicated. Remind me why I do it?

Oh yeah.

Sometimes things need to be planned. Sephiroth can't just spontaneously take over Zack's mind and attack Nautilus. That would create all kinds of OOC backlash I don't even want to think about.


Still, I shall deal with it. There are more people wanting to get involved now. Good thing I have lists or I'd never keep track of them. At least Sephiroth isn't utterly alone against all these people who are going to want to smack his ass back down. >.> He's got Zack - albiet brainwashed - and Blackarachnia too.

Yeah, that's another goddamn spider in my life now. XD

But she'll prove useful until Seph regains his sanity.


In othe, non-RP news, it looks like I'll have to sign on again. No new jobs from the agency, which I'm vaguely grateful for at the moment. I don't think I could handle a job and this plot at the same time - hence I want to just rush through it all before I get another job but I can't do that because there must be build-up.

Anyway. I'm going to call the jobcentre in the morning. Better do it before I run out of money.

Been inspired to work on a couple old stories lately too, or at least to work with old characters. Perhaps over the weeked? I'll have to put the files on to my memorystick so I can work on them on the laptop. Might as well try to get something productive done over the weekend rather than read manga. I've been buying so much of it lately. At least I managed to finish one of my series, even if the end did throw me into a funk for the rest of the day. Is a happy ending too much to ask for? D: Especially one where the cute younger male and the hot older guy end up together and happily in love for the rest of their days rather than said older guy turning out to be a sociopathic magic-wielding assassin who vowed years before to kill the cute younger man? *facepalms, sobs*
sabulana: (Default)
I have a job~



I start tomorrow. No, I'm not looking forward to it. Six weeks of data entry work? Not exactly my idea of heaven but then again... I might be able to get a new computer with the money I earn. Gotta look on the bright side, right?
sabulana: (Hugplz)
On my second week of work and they're saying they're going to extend it by one, maybe two more weeks. On one hand... yay work but on the other...

I think it's driving my insane. I hate it. Well, the company isn't bad. They've got a third woman in to help out as well and she's alright. But I don't think I can take much more data entry. By mid afternoon all the numbers are blurring together and I get headaches sometimes too. I do take breaks from the computer with Elaine but one of the women working the main office - we're in a separate room off from there - gives us dirty looks every time we leave the room. >_>

Speaking of dirty looks...

Fridays at the place I'm working are Casual Fridays. So last Friday, it being a nice day, I was just in a simple vest top and jeans. And I'm thinking maybe that was the reason the nun on my bus back to Sunderland gave me a really nasty look. I can't really think of any other reason. Unless there is something about me that screams 'FILTHY HERETIC' or something. >_>

But anyway. Work is mind-numbingly boring but it's work. I am still not happy about having to get three buses there every morning. I can't wait for it to be over. The first thing I'm going to do once it's finished is sleep. I shall spend a day in bed, just relaxing. And then, when I finally get up, I'll probably be on the phone to the jobcentre, signing back on, which I'm really not looking forward to but I can't be without money.
sabulana: (Barbeque)
Survived my first day at work. XD Augh but getting there was a hassle though. I left early with the intention of getting the early bus - except it was late, which meant I missed my second bus and then in turn, missed the third. -_- Then when I finally got on to the bus that would get me to the industrial estate, I ended up having to walk the long way around to get to it. I got there just in time, all the same, but it was still annoying.

I'm not the only one starting though, which is a bit of a relief. I have someone to talk to when it gets too boring or when we're on a break. ^^; It's pretty dull but it could be worse. And it's work.

Also took me until this morning to get through to the jobcentre to sign off this morning. >.< God, but that was irritating. And then I was put on hold for a while... I ended up signing off about fifteen minutes before I had to leave the house. Not particularly happy about that but at least I finally got through. I get my last payment off them this week, thankfully. I'm pretty much down to my last pennies. What I get from them should last me until I get paid and then... well, we'll see. This isn't going to last too long - I have no real hopes or expectations of getting a permanant job out of this and I'm not sure I would take it even if there was. ^^; Maybe if I didn't need to catch three buses to get there, I would but... I want something a little easier to get to.

Anyway~ Have a meme~ I yoinked it from [ profile] moggy1644 

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next 4-7 sentences on your LJ along with these instructions.
5. Don't you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it! Just pick up whatever is closest.
6. Tag five people.

There was a newcomer in the village. New people were always a source of interest and speculation among the Them, but this time Pepper had impressive news.
'She's moved into Jasmine Cottage and she's a witch,' she said. 'I know because Mrs Henderson does the cleaning and she told my mother she gets a witches newspaper. She gets loads of ordinary newspapers, too, but she gets this special witches' one.'
'My father says there's no such thing as witches,' said Wensleydale, who had fair, wavy hair and peered seriously out at life through thick, black rimmed spectacles. It was widely believed  that he had once been christened Jeremy, but no one ever used the name, not even his parents, who called him Youngster.

- From Good Omens, by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman. It was literally right next to the monitor, from when I last checked details before posting Aziraphale's app at The Wake. XD

I tag... ffff... whoever wants to do it, I guess? XD
sabulana: (don't cry for me)
I start work tomorrow. Part of me is all "Yay work~" but the rest of me... is not looking forward to it at all. I've been feeling uneasy about it ever since I heard about it. If I was the kind to follow my instincts all the time, I would have turned it down but the 'sensible' part of me insists that I need the work, even if it's only for a couple weeks and my mother will also be happy I've found work, however temporary. Taking the job is the sensible thing to do but... I really don't want to. And I can't even really say why I don't want to do it. There isn't a reason for it. I'm just feeling incredibly nervous about it and I can't even really pinpoint the reason why. Location? The speed at which it was all sorted out? My lack of money which means I might not be able to afford to buy lunch - in which case, I'd better be able to find something in the kitchen to make up my own lunches.

The lack of funds it the reason I had to skip my FanBBS meeting yesterday too. ;-; Sounds like they had a blast too. I just finished reading the blog entry. Dr Who exhibit at the Life centre. Man, I wish I could have gone... >:

Played Star Ocean 4 and TWEWY over the weekend instead. Started a new game on both because... well. Just because, mostly. I wanted to increase stats and level up more on TWEWY earlier and Star Ocean... I just wanted something to do other than battle endlessly. I've tried training until my brain feels like it's melting but I still struggle with the bosses and things. But OHMYGOD I adore the characters. XD All of them. I swear~~ Well, I'd like to smack Edge upside the head but then.. well....

And... apparently my brother and his girlfriend have broken up. I have no idea why. Mutual thing according to my mother but she won't interrogate him. >_> I'll have to find out what happened later.
sabulana: (OMGWTF?!)
Well. Crap.

Here I was, ready to write something happy and then the phone rang.

That agency again, from a couple weeks ago. At last, right? Except not. The original job I went for with them 'never took off', as the woman told me. They couldn't get in contact with the company and so never managed to get anyone to do the job at all. But there is some sort of good news. She has another job offer for me. But it's in Washington, which makes it more complicated. I could make it there for the ridiculously early starting time of 7:45am but... it's only for two weeks. Is it worth signing off for two weeks? Once those two weeks are up, I'm right back where I started. But I'd have more on my CV...

There is another problem. I might not be able to afford to get through there. I don't have time for a test run either, unless I go on Monday - and I'll have to have accepted the job by then since it starts on Tuesday.

And this is all assuming the company - which I don't even know - accepts my application.

Everyone I know will probably tell me to go for it... but I have serious doubts about this. Maybe I'm just scared because it's sudden and I feel like I have no time - jobcentre on Friday, babysitting I think was this Saturday and my FanBBS meet on Sunday, Monday is a Bank Holiday, which means the buses run slowly too...


I need to go to the hospital next week with my boyfriend for his appointment too. Augh!


Just got a phone call back from Zenith. >.> I accepted their offer so the woman will send my CV off tonight and I'll get a phone call tomorrow about it.

Fingers crossed this will all work out for the best.
sabulana: (Grump)
Morning has come and gone and still no word about that job. I was supposed to hear from them earlier but... well, there are still a few hours left before the office shuts so I guess there is still time to hear from them.

I had an appointment with my jobcentre adviser earlier and let her know about the job. She seems more excited than I am. >.> But after these last couple days of hearing no word about when I start, I'm feeling more anxious than relieved at finding work. Now I'm beginning to wonder if I will ever start. First I was told Monday, then Tuesday and then 'probably Wednesday' but now... I'm thinking it will likely be some time next week or not at all.

Either way, I still got some snazzy new shoes. I told my adviser that I needed a new pair for work so she gave me a form and sent me off to Barretts. I do need shoes though - I just don't have any smart shoes anymore. They're either falling apart or just not suitable for working in an office. I would post pictures of them if I could. I'm breaking them in at the moment. I must say, my grey-with-coloured-hearts socks do not go well with them. XD

If I don't get a call about the job though, confirming when I start, then I have to go back to the jobcentre on Friday to sign. If I do get the call, then I have the number to phone to sign off - though I'm not looking forward to that ordeal. I'll probably end up on hold for hours. >_
sabulana: (Barbeque)
So I was supposed to get a call earlier to confirm a start date and time for a job I heard about on Friday. I got a call about it on Friday morning and then had to go see a woman from an agency about it - it was an interview but she never called it as such... but I know an interview when I experience one. >.> Then I had to fill out an application form and sort out one or two other details and she said I would get a call today about when I start. If I start.

So I wait all day for the call. Except then I think, "What if they don't call my mobile?" since I was at my boyfriend's house. Even though they managed to contact me in the first place on my mobile, they do also have my home phone number. So I come home this afternoon but I get a call on the way back. Cue relief~ Except that they haven't been able to contact the company I would actually be doing the work for regarding my start date and time. So... though the job was supposed to start on Tuesday, the earliest I will be able to start in Wednesday. I'll get another call from them tomorrow morning if I have the job or not but either way, I still gotta go back to the jobcentre then. >_<

Finished at Gateway to Work now anyway so I don't have to go back there. The team I switched to won the competition too so I got two free cinema tickets~ Used them last night to go see Iron Man 2. Which was fun~~ Though the in-depth conversation about creating new elements afterward was...less than thrilling. >.> And I could have done without the commentary on how hot Scarlett Johansson is too. Even though I agree. But still. Way to make me feel inadequate, dear boyfriend. -_- Naw, it's okay really. XD

Anyway~ I had a totally weird dream last night.

I worked for a private investigator as an assistant when we had a visit from Aziraphale, hiring us to look for Crowley. Crowley had got himself mixed up in some really bad stuff and though he was on Earth still, Aziraphale couldn't find him so that was were we came in. Our trail led us to an abandoned housing estate - except it was not so abandoned as we first thought. The buildings were inhabited by monsters - zombies and necromorphs and more - and we had to fight our way through. Finally, we got through a house and were resting on top of a fire escape after locking thr door behind us. We thought we were able to rest for a bit but no, a helicopter appeared and started shooting at us. I looked around, located a minigun and began shooting back, aiming from the tail propellor. Unfortunately, I couldn't hit it and it flew past the house. I woke up before it came back though. Now I wonder if we found Crowley or if he's still in trouble... ^^;;;
sabulana: (DO NOT WANT)
fffff I find out whether or not I have a work trial tomorrow. I'm so goddamn nervous. If I get the work trial then getting the actual job should be fairly easy. But if I don't, then it's back to the jobcentre for me. ;-;

I've been trying not to think about it much, to be honest. Spent the weekend reading and playing games to distract myself. Been taking care of my boyfriend too. Since his trip to the dentist, his toothache hasn't gone away. He went back on Friday to see if they could do anything for him and was given some antibiotics. They made him feel really ill and he started getting really bad pains in his abdomen. Really bad. Bad enough that we had to take a trip to the hospital to make sure he was alright - he had taken rather a lot of painkillers by this point and none of them did anything. I can't tell you how much fun those six hours weren't. -_- Roughly 45 mins in the A&E waiting room, then another half hour in the Fracture Clinic to see the temporary GP there and then he sent us up to Surgical, where we waited until 2am. They took some blood and sent us home.

By that time, the pain had gone but then it came back before we'd even left the hospital. After that, we've limited how many painkillers my boyfriend can have - without me there, he'd have swallowed them like candy - and made sure he eats when he's supposed to and so far, he seems alright. The pain in his side comes and goes but it hasn't been as bad as it was on Friday. Since we've heard nothing back from the hospital yet, we can assume there was nothing in his blood to cause alarm and now we wait to hear when he can go have an ultrasound scan on his gallbladder. I still worry about him though. It did wonders to take my mind off my disastrous interview though. XD

Hm. Not much else has happened really. I'm really hungry though. Waiting for my mother to get out of the bath so we can eat. ^^;
sabulana: (Hugplz)
Augh. All I want to do today is hide away and pretend nothing ever happened. Seriously. It's been a pretty good day, all in all but...

I'm sure I failed the interview I had. I didn't talk too much - the other girl I was being interviewed with asked the questions before I had a chance to speak up much. I did speak, of course and tried to relax and stuff but I was pretty goddamn nervous. I'm sure I screwed it up. The guy who took us there said we did alright though, and so did one of the other guys at Working Links - it seems the guy who interviewed us called up to give a little feedback. I won't find out until Tuesday whether or not I get a work trial though. If I do get it, then I have to go in for a couple days, go through the training and they'll get to see if I really am suitable or not and whether they want to keep me on. The hours are pretty good - 9am - 4pm Monday to Friday and the pay is £6/hour. Not too bad really.

I'm working myself up over this so badly though. I'd really like a glass of wine right now but I'll wait until my mother gets home. We're going to watch Coraline together tonight I think. Something like that should help take my mind off the mess I made of that interview. >_<

Anyway~ on a more positive note, I should have earned a qualification in Food Safety today. We had a talk on dangers and things and then a test to do. I think I got one question wrong but otherwise it was pretty easy. Multiple choice exams usually are. I should get a certificate in a couple weeks though. I'm not even sure when I'd ever use the knowledge I got today since I have little interest in working in food but you never know. It could come in handy some day which is why I agreed to do the course in the first place.

I've also sort of finished the first draft of a fanfic I've been working on. It's a couple chapters long and I should get around to typing it soon but I kept skipping bits because the characters wouldn't shut up and fight. The fight scene sucks too. I'm not even sure the death at the end was emotional enough either but I can figure it out when I get around to typing it up. ^^; But now I've got that done, I can concentrate on rewriting a chapter from my NaNo novel during breaks now. I already started today but I need to go back and look up the feedback I got from others back in November.

So... apart from my miserable interview, it's been a good day. ^_^ ...Just hope the computer doesn't crash again like it did yesterday.
sabulana: (sabulana dansen)
So I should be gone but I'm not oh well. :>

I woke up late since I went to bed late last night. It was almost 3AM and I was starting to see things. I'm half surprised Lolly didn't come tell me to go to bed by then. She normally does and one should always listen when their cats are talking to them.

But I feel sooooo much better now I've had a long sleep and a shower~ <3 I promise I am, so please don't worry about me, Eco. I'll get more sleep over the weekend too.

Now I'm just printing off the information I want to look over for Regenesis. I'll come up with modifications better with the words on a page in front of me. If I can't get on The Last Remnant, I'll work on that. Anything is better than watching the snooker with my boyfriend.

Although. I did plan to get Dissidia. >_> I suppose...whatever happens, I'll still make time to make the changes. I'll have everything all ready by the time I come back.

But I still have to decide which character I'm going to play over at Regenesis. I remembered my poor little Cloud muse yesterday. He doesn't get any attention even though I made a journal for him. His application would be easier to fill in than Emma Honeywell's but her voice comes easier to me...

Printing off a bunch of CVs too. Gonna go around the shops in the town sometime, hand them in and see if I get any response. I think Grainger Games is hiring so I'm going to have a look in there. <3
sabulana: (...Oh.)
I'm finished at Sencia. ;_; Gods, I'm gonna miss everyone there soooo much. They gave me a box of chocolates and a card with well wishes from everyone.

I have also been told that I am 'socialising' tonight. I am not entirely sure what that is going to entail but Iain said Jake might have to babysit...uh...someone. No idea who. And Iain and I may go? I think. Augh. I have no idea because I couldn't understand Iain at all. Most of the phone call was just wind. -_-

By the way...

Why am I supposed to hurry over to his at 1pm when there's no one home until 5? o.O

Oh~ And I've been told the Ladyboys of Bangkok are coming back~ I've been invited to go see them again. I went last year against Iain's wishes and that stirred up some argument and it will do the same this year because he doesn't want me to go. I still don't see why though. He went to a strip club once time - taken by his brother - and I didn't care. So why can't I go to see a show where everyone keeps their clothes on? Thry just dance around on stage a while. It's very entertaining and not all of it is sexual really. So...why can't I go without starting an argument?

Bah. I'm going to talk it over with him and try to understand.

And I'm going. I just need dates/times/tickets. I don't regret going last time, despite the argument and I won't miss it this year either.

RP is taking a back seat for a few days while I get everything sorted. I'll be back on Monday~
sabulana: (Nothing can take me apart)

Why is it so hard to tag lately? Sephiroth's responses are there in my head but it's all...wordless emotion and expressions and I can't find the words to adequately communicate it all.

And don't even get me started on Tas. Bloody kender. -_-

I'm starting to look forward to next week but...

I need to hear back from my boyfriend rather urgently. It is edging ever closer to Friday and I would like to know whether I'm staying at his sister's to help look after the kids this weekend or not. He said he would phone her and ask and then phone me but my last missed call off him was before I even reminded him to ask. So...he's forgotten again. I guess I should call him but it's too late now. He won't be in bed but his parents will and I'll have to call the house phone - Iain talks too much for me to use the landline to call his mobile and I have no credit on mine. It will simply have to wait until tomorrow or Friday. I assume he will call on Friday. He's been busy with Gateway to Work in Pallion this week and next so I don't know what time I'd have to go over his.

Of course, I might just be flailing over nothing because he'll forget to ask until it's too late and I can't. Because his sister really should have more warning than a day - or, worst case scenario, me just turning up on the doorstep - which I wouldn't do anyway. Yes, I'm welcome round there but I don't want to impose.

Anyway. Probably time I thought about going to bed. I've been so tired lately and I have work in the morning.

Can't quite believe I finish on Friday. Amy completed my leaving paperwork yesterday. Guess they can't wait to be rid of me. XD Not really though. She asked Darren how I've been doing and he had nothing but nice stuff to say - reliable, trustworthy, gets the job done and doesn't have to be told twice, gained a lot of confidence - but I'm still quiet. It's not a bad thing because I speak up when I need to and it's just part of who I am.


There's been another girl helping out these last couple weeks. I had thought that she might be my 'replacement'. But she has a placement interview tomorrow elsewhere and the other woman who might be helping out has an interview on Friday for a job. So they might be left without all help from Friday onwards. >_> I feel a bit bad. Even with help from me and anyone else on placement, the admins are really rushed off their feet, always busy and always pestered for everything. But I guess there will be new help soon. I hope some new people are sourced for placements there - before Friday. I would help train them up in what to do. I was going to do that with Danielle but she might be going somewhere else now so... *shrugs*

...Damn it, I want a proper job.
sabulana: (sabulana dansen)
Today has been rather...bipolar. I started off this morning with no energy and feeling like I was faking every emotion (Hey! I turned into a Nobody! XDDD). That changed this afternoon. Filing was killing me so I stopped to take some paracetamol - turned out I forgot it - but had a bit of a laugh with another placement-girl at Sencia and from then on, everything has been pretty much rainbows and unicorns.

My boyfriend came to meet me after work today too.We had a little talk about what's been bothering me and I mentioned that I wasn't going to spend anywhere near as much on him anymore. His response? " wuv me~ and I need things~" (all in his 'cute little boy' voice...not fooled.) to which I said, "Pfft. No, you don't." And then the conversation switched to other things. But he has been warned. Next time we're shopping, I'm putting my foot down so he knows absolutely that I'm serious about this.

But it left me feeling a bit empowered. I thought it was going to be awkward and lead to arguments but I guess we were both in too good a mood for that. I've let him know how I feel though and that is the main thing.

Heh... Once upon a time, not so long ago really, I would have been a lot more nervous about revealing  stuff like that. My boyfriend can be pretty scary when he's mad even though I know he'd never hurt me. But I guess I've been feeling a lot better about myself recently and that's boosted my confidence so goddamn high. Couple months ago, I'd be terrified of strangers and I hated answering the phone but now everything is better.

Family is visiting from Wales. My aunt and uncle and probably my cousins too. They arrived last night so I'm home over the weekend to see them and be social among my family and stuff. I remember last time they were visiting and my cousins - they're only young so they can't be blamed for this - wanted to play with the cats so much and were chasing them around the house. My mother thought they'd get scratched for sure but nothing happened. They just went and hid upstairs. XD
sabulana: (Goddamn Maggots!)
Apparently, the card bill that my boyfriend assures me continually 'will be paid off in a couple months' has in fact had no money put towards it for the last two fucking months. Words cannot describe how pissed off this makes me because now I am using my money to pay for his stuff. It wouldn't be so bad if his money was going towards a good cause, like, say, my goddamn birthday present that I was promised back in APRIL. But no. His videogames are far more important than anything else at all in the world ever. So while he's happily spending hundreds of pounds on games, (including emotionally blackmailing me into spending my money on him too), I am left with virtually none of the things I want. I even have to goddamn ask if I can go spend my own fucking money on the things I want.

Never again. I fucking swear it this time. I am not letting him get away with this any more. I'll buy his birthday present, sure - new subscription to Xbox Live and a game - but nothing else until I either have my laptop or a Nintendo DS. My boyfriend has offered to buy me a special card I can download games on to once I have a DS but I've told him that there are certain games I must have legal copies off, not illegal ones. Why? Because I fucking said so, that's why.


On a lighter note - back at work properly today. Darren was back as well after he took a week's holiday and had no clue what was going on after Mirella reorganised everything while he was gone. Since I was also absent much of last week, I didn't know much of what was going on either. But I had to tidy up the cellar. I used to find it so creepy down there but now I enjoy going down there. It's quiet and cool. Smells a bit musty but I like that too. It's just really dusty. Normally, I'm not down for long because I'm just seeking out archived files. Today though, I was organising the mess that was the stationary supplies. It should be a lot easier to find things now. ^^ Plus, I got rid off all the empty boxes. Took a while but it was easier and less fiddly than sorting out the petty cash vouchers from the last god-knows-how-long.

And I realised today that...I only have this week and next left there. ;_; I'll miss it. Working there was fun. Hopefully, I'll get another job soon but I've not got much hope. If I don't hear anything back soon, I'm going to apply for the data entry thing I did at Royal Mail last Christmas again. I'd sooner avoid working night shift again because waiting around in the snow at 6:30AM is probably the furthest thing away from fun there is to do after a hard night's work when all I want to do is sleep.


sabulana: (Default)

August 2012

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