Sabulana

Alright, so the week got off to a bd start butthings are okay now. Monday and Tuesday were reserved for randomly crying, Wednesday and Thursday for feeling enerally crappy but Friday and aturday weren't so bad. I was more social than I wanted on Saturday too. I enjoyed going out to Riley's with pople on the afternoon but I didn't really want to go out on the night. I probably seemed really down and anti-social but I didn't want to be there and for the most part I seemed to be being ignored. I felt extra crappy after we couldn't get in the casino because I don't have any ID. I would have offered to go home but Iain would never let me walk back to his on my own.

So we ended up back in Riley's agan and then in The White Room (fucking hated it, too noisy, too crowded) and then in The Independent (not as bad, less crowded) before heading back to Iain's.

And before I forget - I had my assessment at the Royal Mail on Thursday. Feeling crappy probably didn't help but everyone thought it was nerves. I don't think so because I didn't actually feel nervous until I was there. I just felt ill.

Anyway, I passed the assessment and now I'm just waiting on more information. Iain wants me to work nghts, so I put those shifts down for first choice but I'm not sure I actually want to do it. I'll do the work, yes but I honestly don't know if I could handle it. It is for four weeks though Iain told me six originally and I would not be able to come home at all. I've never been so long ithout seeing my mother. I would not be able to get online at all probably for the entire duration. That means no Daisychain and no Eco. I...really don't know if I can handle that.

People I know in RL may think it's pathetic and I'm just too obsessed to go so long withot my roleplay but in all honesty, it's not just te roleplay I adore. It's the charactersin it and themuns. Especially my Eco. (Mine all mine! *clings posessively*) I'll miss her terribly. If I can ever find a way online, it will be for her and not just for Daisychain.

...and all this does is remind me of how much I fucking hate Christmas.